synopsis of two souls sparking

• a nickle arcade
• a slap on the chest
  
• the top of a boulder in Boulder
• the freedom of a hawk
• the decision to kiss
• Irish folk music and two lesbian arguing over shoes
• an early morning interruption
  
• the perfect split between savory and sweet
• Collide(ing) with the help of a guitar on a bed in a basement
• a flight
• the excitement of uncertainty
• conversations from a thousand miles away and a mile above
• falling-longing-attaching-reading till one in the morning
  
• uneasiness caused by an underwear model
• asparagus, a sail boat, a sad girl named Shelly and some toast
• a train- a flight
• an emerald city
• an unveiling
• friends, first meetings, frog legs, and Guinness
• a train
• a stomach ache
• an airy loft- light and white
• a song from a Pretender
• a hyperactive hike
• a walk with questions looming
• a man in his head
• laughing about absolutely nothing
• a journal and a magnet
• a flight
• longing though only for a week
• learning to pray, learning to trust
  
• a flight
• a rainy reunion and the clarity of an aspen tree
• a windy hill and a tattered book store
• two dollar beers
• a snowy drive
• the view from a gondola high above a mountain town
• a sad movie and a couch not meant for two
• a closet organization
• a BBQ, a comedy club and a talk about uncertain futures
• some tears
• an internship and an internal sadness stemmed from selfishness
• a flight
• a koala bear mask in a box that looked as though it contained a bomb
• a mistake not to go to a concert
• a plan involving subletting
• a flight
• a tour of the east
• a new connection
• a bed, glowing in late afternoon sunlight
• an early alarm
• a shadow disappearing around a corner
• hesitation
• craigslist housing ads
• a busy couple weeks
• a canceled flight
• a graduation
• a request for space
• a week without
• apprehension
• one person's decision to hold on, another to let go
• a Wednesday night
• a loss
• a blank computer screen
• an emptiness....

Looking back- its all so clear- so crisp- the memories- so lifelike. The memories I am supposed to box up and put on a high shelf only to be looked at again when I am rummaging in the closet for some obscure and rarely used object, like an air mattress or Christmas decorations....

Im not ready.

People tell me that I need to be. People who want to see me happy. But, these memories make me happy! Why would I want to let them go? People tell me Ill make new memories- I understand that.. but none will be like these. These belong to me and only ONE other person, and they are "ours" and no one else. Though my memory holds and can recall them easier- more distinct, more vividly, I know they are in us both.

I am not ready to let them go-
Not today-

Maybe tomorrow....